Sunday 19 May 2013

#347 - Everville: The First Pillar



 Kindle Store > Books > Fiction > Fantasy > Epic
Indie Writer (Self-published)


Description:

Owen Sage is the emblematic college freshman at Easton Falls University. With all the worries about his first year in college, he was not prepared for what would happen next. His way of life was flipped upside down when he mysteriously crossed into another dimension, into the beautiful land of Everville. His excitement was abruptly halted when he discovered that there was a darkness forged against both the natural world, which he knew well, and the new land which he discovered, Everville. He must devise a plan to save both worlds while joining forces with the race of Fron and The Keepers, whom both harbor hidden secrets he must learn in order to gain power over the evil that dwells in The Other In Between.

With a race against time to save both worlds, his short time at Easton Falls did not quite prepare him for the evil, dark forces he must fight in order to conquer The Other In Between.

Product Details:

The Author, Roy, very kindly let me have a copy of his book for review as a Kindle download.

At the time of writing this post, it is available as a free download HERE. Normally it is listed as £12.00, which is a little rich for some.

* * * *

Summary:

I believe that this may well be Roy's debut novel, and it's the first in a series based on the fantasy land of Everville.

I quite liked the concept actually, of the Land In Between, which was surrounded by other fantasy lands.  The contract of evil represented by "them" and good represented by The Keepers of the various Pillars.   

At times I found it a little over descriptive, and there were some sentence construction and chapter bridging problems.  In particular I hated the beginning of Chapter 8.  I did like the unexpected twist of a villain in the present helping "them" (I didn't see that coming).

An editing firm is given credit on the Amazon page, but I can't say if that was in regard to actual editing or just formatting of the ebook.  My personal view would be that it was probably just in respect of the formatting ..... I am willing to be corrected if I'm wrong though.

Overall, the issues that I had with the book a good editor could have made a distinct difference.  I did find myself itching to reach for my highlighter and red pen and edit the work to gain a better flow.  It does take courage to put your work out there, and massive to Kudos to Roy for this reasonable first novel, in what could turn about to really quite an interesting series.

I enjoyed it enough to be keen to read future offerings by Roy to see what goes down, and if Everville will ultimately be delivered from the evil that "them" are determined to spread.


Rating:

3 stars from me I think, but with good editing it would probably have made 3.5 stars.  For all the Fantasy fans out there, give it a go.

My Notes of Errors/Bug Bears:

There really weren't many, but the things that bothered me in particular:

I had to re-read Chapter 8 as some of it didn't flow well.

58% "His eyes were fixated ...." - fixed would have been better, and "fixated" was used a few times - personally, I felt it was overkill.

"Standing on all four legs, they must have been at least 6 feet tall ....".  I think this may be a gender thing, I checked it with male and females, and all the females had the same reaction - i.e. they would still have been 6 feet tall standing on 1 or 3 legs, unless they were standing on their hind legs, in which case they would be taller.  The males saw nothing wrong with the sentence - bizarre.

60% "Carwyn squeezed the mountain dweller called Ewan" - really? I had to re-read the paragraph again to make sense of it .... it might just have been me though.

83% Mention is made by Owen of "my parents house" - I went back and check the beginning and it mentioned that it was just Owen and his Mother .... am I being over picky?

Given that it was a reasonably long novel, that wasn't a long list.

Hugs

Kay










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